I have noticed that the older we grow, the more we begin to ridicule the idea of death. That is until it happens to you. Or someone you know. Or someone close to someone you know. Then it becomes a reality, a scary one at that.
I just found out that my friends father passed away. It came as a real shock to me because I had only recently got in touch with him after finding out that after being classmates 14 years back in primary school, he is now my neighbour. We decided to establish a weekly ritual of meeting every Thursday and kept to it two weeks in a row. Till about three weeks back when he started canceling our meetings because his dad was ill. He made it sound so casual, almost like a minor fever, I did not at all suspect it to be something life threatening and I respect him for his courage throughout that time. I would've been a crying wreck in the same situation.
I found out about what happened through a mutual friend and it shocked me because I hadn't spoken to him in over a week due to exams and it left me feeling helpless. I wanted to call but then I couldn't really bring myself to as I had no clue what to say or how I should comfort him.It got me thinking about how helpless we ALL are in the face of each others misery. The confusion you feel as to what you should do and how you should re act is something that I was going through for the first time and it killed me from the inside.
I woke up today morning to a text from him informing me of the same. After I was done with college I tried calling him but he did not respond.He did, however reply with a text. I shall wait for him to call me when he is ready to talk.
His strength in the situation amazes me and has taught me a lot.
And although I cannot tell him how I feel or do anything to comfort him (As my words cannot do anything really to fill up such a large void in his life.) I hope he knows that I am with him as a friend whenever he needs someone to turn to.
We are so much stronger than we ourselves realize.